Yay! April already and here's something the group’s been crying out for for years. A circular walk that’s all downhill. Our clever walk writers have discovered a loophole in the local topiary or something. It’s not all plain sailing, though. It’s a long way and the bus replacement has been replaced by a horse and cart.
Lunch: The quaintly named Cods Wallop in Little Sumchance. An expensive and imaginary menu. Mostly noodles, but why not try their Poisson d’Avril.
Tea: With luck, the undersea café, Bubbles will have reopened. They were having a spot of bother with flooding but they’ve patched it up a bit. Their cakes are sort of OK but their lugworm pies are best avoided. Alternatively, if you can put up with the noise, you might be able to get a cup of tea at the Ilfrapool Anagram, the all-day thrash metal discotheque.
Transport:
Get the 5:30 a.m. horse and cart from Deepfryers Station (leaves from nearby Knott Close). Bring a cushion - and a carrot for the horse. Change at Ninny Junction, where, hopefully, the cart to Ilfrapool will be waiting. (I've heard that this horse suffers from 'tummy trouble' so try not to sit at the front).
The cart returns at 4.20 p.m. Luckily, the horses aren't on strike. In the last gallop poll, they voted “neigh” and accepted an enhanced hay offer. Anyway, it’s in their interests to have a stable economy.
Directions: here. Difficulty: 1/10. 30 miles might seem a lot but it is all downhill. For something tougher, do it in reverse. (Unfortunately, the directions aren’t clear which way’s which). It’s not all through wet clay but, when you get to that bit, keep an eye out for one of the walk writers’ shoes.
If you can, bring some Wessex crowns. Not all establishments accept English pounds. More about April Fool here.
6 comments:
Great alternative! Anyone up for a group save ticket? Meet at the ticket office at 5am
Getting there by bike, could give a lift to 1 or 2 people, depend on the weight …
A fantastic idea! Great to have an imaginative walk choice for a change...
Whew, no bears 🐻🐻🐻 this year!
Arrived at Knott Close early but there was already a huge crowd, all eager to try this new walk. Maybe 100 or more. Then the cart arrived a bit late (the horse had slept in). I couldn’t see properly from the back but I doubt more than 15 squeezed onto the cart. I slunk off and did a different walk. I heard later that there were problems with tea. Bubbles was closed after a ‘major incident‘ and the Anagram was only allowing people with trainers in.
W=April-Fool
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